The World’s Greatest Lover Award


Wrong Don

The legendary Don Juan, even if he were a true historical character, couldn’t claim the title of, “The World’s Greatest Lover.” That designation would have to be based on the world’s greatest loving act, and that’s a no brainer.

“So, the envelope, please … ”
(Imagine a tearing sound, then a flourish)
“The winner … of the World’s Greatest Lover Award … is … (long pause) … ALMIGHTY GOD, in his role as the perfectly innocent Lamb that was slain!”

Silence.

“Where’s the jubilation?” I ask.

From somewhere, the invisible Announcer replies, “He was in the world, and the world came to be through Him, and the world did not know Him. He came to His own, and His own did not receive Him.” (John 1:10-11) “He was despised and rejected by men; a man of sorrows, and acquainted with grief; and as one from whom men hide their faces he was despised, and we esteemed him not. Surely he has borne our griefs and carried our sorrows; yet we esteemed him stricken, smitten by God, and afflicted. But he was wounded for our transgressions; he was crushed for our iniquities; upon him was the chastisement that brought us peace, and with his stripes we are healed.” (Isaiah 53:3-5)

“Wow,” I say, “He really is the world’s greatest Lover.

“Thanks, invisible Announcer, see ya later.”

“Just you hold up there, Jim.” I glance around to see if there are any other Jims around. There aren’t.

“Uh … yessir?”

“What are you going to do about it, Jim?”

I think about a good answer while looking for the nearest exit. “Umm … it’s already a done deal, isn’t it? I mean, what can I do about it?”

“Do you want His death to be for naught?”

“You said He was crushed for our iniquities, but I’m an okay guy, and there are lots of people around worse than me. I’m no murderer, thief, adulterer, liar—”

“Really?” He interrupts.

“Me? No way!”

“Way!” His voice is now more of a growl. “You’ve never stretched the truth til it broke? You’ve never lusted on a woman? You’ve never ‘borrowed’ something and neglected to return it? You’ve never wished someone dead?”

I feel my face flushing. “Well … that’s not the same as actually doing it.”

“You have heard that it was said to those of old, ‘You shall not murder; and whoever murders will be liable to judgment.’ But I say to you that everyone who is angry with his brother will be liable to judgment; whoever insults his brother will be liable to the council; and whoever says, ‘You fool!’ will be liable to the hell of fire.”
(Matthew 5:21-22)

“Hey, nobody can live by that standard! What’re you tryin’t pull on me?”

“As it is written: ‘None is righteous, no, not one; no one understands; no one seeks for God.'” (Romans 3:10-11)

“I’m as righteous as the next guy!”

“Then you and the next guy have earned the wages of sin, which is eternal death.”

“So says you.”

“I speak for the King of kings. You know, the Lord of lords. We’re really close.”

“Well, I gotta lot of living to do. I’ll keep all that in mind.”

“The Lord doesn’t agree with you. For he says, ‘In a favorable time I listened to you, and in a day of salvation I have helped you.’ Behold, now is the favorable time; behold, now is the day of salvation.” (2 Corinthians 6:2)

“You’re really serious about this salvation stuff.”

“As a heart attack.”

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